Category Archives: Student Government

Earlier this morning, 3 students, Andrea Pino, Landen Gambill, along with alumni Annie Clark and former UNC Associate Dean of Students Melinda Manning filed a formal complaint with the U.S. Department of Education’s Office of Civil Rights on behalf of themselves and 64 other unnamed victims against UNC.

Pino, Gambill, and Clark, all sexual assault victims filed the suit after being sexually assaulted while attending UNC. Melinda Manning, who resigned after 11 years at UNC, due to the treatment of the victims, also joined in the suit. While seeking out help from the university, they claim that the university violated several of their rights as survivors of sexual assault. The survivors claim that UNC has an open hostility towards the survivors.

Gambill’s assault came at a unique time in which there was a change in policy at UNC due to the “Dear Colleague” letter sent out by the US Department of Education, to many universities regarding sexual assault policies. At the beginning of Gambill’s trial, UNC had already enacted the guidelines set out by the letter. Therefore, her trial began under two Honor Court students, a faculty member and an administrative chair. During this trial, Gambill reported, along with several other students, that they were asked insensitive questions, were discriminated against, and their rights were violated. In one instance, Gambill claims the student representing her gave information to her parents without permission, a direct violation of the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act (FERPA).

During the trial, Gambil also claims that the university tries to re-victimize her by blaming her for what happened. While in a relationship with her boyfriend, she claims he raped and then stalked her after the relationship ended.  She claims they made her testify in gruesome detail and was then questioned as to why she had not left the relationship earlier. In addition to the trial, the claims also indicates that the university is covering up the incompetency and slow moving process that students must go through. She says that the university offers little to no explanation as to what the process is or what the next step will be. She is not the only one, as many UNC students do not now the resources and courses of actions that can be taken.

This failure by the university is a very disturbing one. Should these allegations be true, this scandal will further tarnish the reputation of our university that is already questioned underneath Chancellor Thorp.  This issue, which affects thousands of both men and women both on campus and across the nation, is not an issue for students, or for that matter school officials, to be handling. Gambil’s case should have been tried in the court of law, with actual licensed attorneys and judges. After they decide the evidence, then the school should make its decision. The university needs to explain and define its policy clearly and explicitly or face further lawsuits and complaints.

Breaking News! I have received inside information reports that Art Pope is continuing his dastardly campaign, twirling his mustache in joy, of taking over the University. The Vast Right Wing communications committee (I’m a nonvoting member) has uncovered that the Papal plot The Papists plot The Pope plot The Illuminati   The Pope Center is financing Art Pope’s return to UNC. Mr. Pope will be reenrolling as a student of UNC because he knows that the best way to destroy something is from the inside. He will be working his way through student government until he reaches his final goal: Student Body President.

Not satisfied with buying the Chancellorship, Mr. Pope will use his vast resources to conduct a shadow campaign along with his legitimate campaign for SBP so that he can buy all the votes he needs to take over as SBP. He has seen large success with this technique in the past and hopes it will continue to serve him well. He also has a team of researchers from the Pope Center looking over the Constitution to see if our illustrious and heroic SBP Will Leimenstoll can be impeached. At current publication time, they have about 8 reasons why he can be impeached, including but not limited to: violating the spirit of the Carolina Way, not enforcing laws he doesn’t like, and disliking Carolina basketball.

The radical ideas that Mr. Pope hopes to enact as the dastardly SBP are to eliminate bureaucratic waste, help the University stay financially solvent, institute single sex housing, and keep the Union open 24 hours (he likes Alpine-preferably the Oval Office bagel). Do you know what that would mean? It would mean that the Papists have finally taken over and fiscal sanity will reign supreme!!!!

Who can stop this dastardly (I really like this word, it rolls off the tongue well) plot? It’s certainly not me. I’m a Senior, I don’t give a damn.  I think we shall have to rely on a vanguard of students who are willing to vote against the Papacy. The Democrats shall be their example for that. They shall have to work by night, anonymously. They are the heroes that we need, but do not deserve. Their protests should begin by posting 95 complaints on their Facebook pages. Then it should emerge from secretive meetings in the Campus Y. Then finally it will come to light as a Facebook event!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mr. Leimenstoll, I’m speaking directly to you now. If you ever wake up tied to a railroad track with a train rapidly approaching, just know that the dastardly (Best. Word. Ever.) executor is Mr. Art Pope.

How do I know this? I have the same amount of evidence as those who believe he forced out our beloved Chancellor Thorpy. Absolutely none.